Culling the herd

Today I took another small but highly significant step forward in cementing the matrimonial pact between me and John:

I've started culling doubles of our DVDs.

When he was away at school for four years, the two of us decided that we could not live without owning our own copies of the Lord of the Rings trilogy (special edition, of course), or the second installment of The Mummy, or the first season of Futurama, or... well, you get the picture.

Since I'm setting up a table at the Merrill Collection's SF/Fantasy Yard Sale again this year (Saturday, September 20th from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the Toronto Reference Library!), I decided now would be the opportune moment to get rid of some excess junk and trim down our burgeoning collection.

I suppose, to the outsider, it seems like a silly thing, this letting go of material goods of which I have an excess. (Two copies of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon? Really?)

But this is an important step for me. It means I am willing to share. It means that if I want to continue to own a copy of Fellowship of the Ring, I will somehow make our relationship work. It means that I will give up my share of the DVD collection should John and I (knock on wood) ever part ways. It means I put more stock in our relationship than I put in my stuff.

I could go into some long diatribe about how my generation has attached too much meaning to material goods and how spirituality has been lost to consumption and the happiness money brings...but that would just be boring.

Bottom line: I love John more than I love stuff.

Now if only I could get John to cull a few books....

ZUTARA LIVES!!!

Squee! Got first place in Dotmoon's Best of Fandom UFO 2007 fanfiction contest round one!!!

Thanks to everyone who voted for me! Round two will determine best of fandom overall, so stay tuned and vote for me through round two!

ZUTARA LIVES!

(Edit: the administrator kindly changed the award to reflect how the characters actually look in the story. Note also that voting for best fanfic overall is now up on Dotmoon. Please read the other entries and vote!)

The Schattenjäger lives!

So I was reading the Toronto edition of Metro today on the bus. when I came across this story about Hurricane Gustav.

It was the first test of New Orleans’ new and improved levees, which are still being rebuilt three years after hurricane Katrina. And it was a powerful demonstration of how federal, state and local officials learned some of the painful lessons of the catastrophic 2005 storm that killed 1,600 people.

“They made a much bigger deal out of it, bigger than it needed to be,” 31-year-old security worker Gabriel Knight said in New Orleans’ nearly empty French Quarter.

“I was here with Katrina. That was a nightmare.
“This was nothing.”

Gabriel Knight? Really? Does the AP reporter even know that Gabriel Knight was the name of a fictional New Orleans detective from the Sierra game back in the early nineties? And is it just coincidence that both Mr. Knights are 31 years old and work in the security field?

Apparently, the Schattenjäger is alive and well in the French quarter....or someone is making shit up and stealing from the video game industry.

I am so e-mailing Jane Jensen.

For Better or For Worse

The finale to For Better or For Worse:


I've been reading FBOFW since I was old enough to discover that boring stack of newspapers actually had comics in them. I was rapt with the first animated Christmas special featured on TV about young Elizabeth, still barely out of infancy, loses her stuffed bunny during a hectic Christmas rush at the shopping mall.

Having grown up with the Pattersons as many other Canadians have, I do feel a touch of sadness at its bittersweet "finale." The sense that we will not get to see them again reminds me of the tenuous connections we have to those around us, even fictional characters. The Pattersons have moved on, moved away, and now their lives are private ones, much as the lives of those friends and family who live apart from us, whether it's overseas, in the next county, or beyond life itself.

Over the years, Lynn Johnston brought us her special brand of humor, sweetness and sadness. The close of her family saga with the strip preceding the finale connected old and young, beginnings and endings, and reminded readers that through all of life, thick, thin, good and bad, those who have each other will endure.

Pattersons, you will be missed.

Eight

To the love of my life, my fiance, my first, my last, my everything.

John--Happy eighth anniversary.

Thank you for saying yes.

(And yes, our love sometimes is as creepy as the picture above.)

When bad writing gets worse

The TRW sent along a link on an Amazon discussion board about some of the most overused and cliched phrases that typically appear in romance books.

Read the hilarity here.

As someone who comes across these phrases on a day-to-day basis, I have to say that they're at least a little more comforting and familiar than the ones that try to be fresh and unique. "He slid into her like a hot knife," or "when he came, it was like a gun going off inside her" or "she opened her mouth like a baby bird to receive him" are not phrases I ever want to see in romance. And yet, I have....

A few more classic lines for you that'll make you beg for "he slanted his mouth over hers" (if I've already posted these, forgive me, but they are worth repeating).:

YOU ARE FOREWARNED OF BAD TASTE AND GENERAL BADNESS:

"My goal is to blow you up and, baby, I’m about to make you explode all over the place."

If a guy said this to me, I'd be searching him for grenades.

"His words made every single cell in her body multiply with excitement."

Cancerific arousal!

"This was what you called total mouth concentration, the solicitation of participation and the promise of satisfaction."

"Have you ever heard of the emancipation proclamation?" "I don't listen to hip hop." --South Park

"If she were some kind of sexual grenade, he’d have been honor-bound to take her down, to blanket her with his body and prevent the explosion from maiming the other males in the vicinity."

Another great explosion metaphor. What really gets me about this line is the fact that the man is "honor-bound" to blow himself up on her explosive sexuality. I'd be honor-bound to RUN AWAY.

"She licked him like a lollipop, only his unique taste was strictly adult candy. He groaned and writhed beneath her feast."

Mmm, adult candy. Enjoy a Tax Lollipop, or Bag O' Mortgage Sugar today!

"He’d sprouted a hammer between his legs, iron hard and clamoring for her grip."

Wow, hardware sex. Now, if only I could write a plumbing fixture metaphor...no, wait, that's too easy... Something about a screwdriver...? Nah....

"Like a child with a new doll—a doll with an erection—she ran her fingers through his hair and trailed them down the side of his face and neck."

What the hell, Mattel? First Barbie and Ken break up, and now you're passing out Woody the Pedo Ranger?

"His huge manhood stood up as if he carried a policeman’s club between his legs."

Just the sexy image I want before being bedded: police brutality.

AUNTHOOD: REDUX

My nephew, Avery Hendrix Kwong

Born this morning, 6 lbs. 5 oz.

Mommy and baby are both doing fine.

He's gonna give Bowie a run for her money in the cuteness department...

Mediocrity Strikes Again!

Results for the Toronto Romance Writers Golden Opportunity Contest came in the mail today. No, I didn't make the finals. But I got lots of good feedback.

My rank: 12th place out of 26...exactly mediocre!

To quote Jean Giraudoux: Only the mediocre are always at their best.

YAY! I'm at my best!!!


So the next little while will be spent polishing up this book, Star Attraction, so I can enter it in to the RWA's Golden Heart this year. I also had lots of fantabulous feedback from the stunningly wicked Moor to work with...it's all good, if harrowing to one's ego.

Hey, no one ever said it would be easy...

I HAZ TEH HAPPY

So picture a day of on-and-off rain onthe opening day of the CNE. As is our tradition, John and I go to shop, eat overpriced corndogs and BBQ corn on the cob, play expensive games to win cheesy prizes, and generally make ourselves sick and silly.

We stop outside the Food Building--one of our must-see stops on our annual EXpedition.

Me: So whaddya wanna do now?
John: Dunno. Let me get out the map.
Me: Aw, you don't need to do that...
John: No, no, just hang on a minute...
Me: *staring off into the sky, wondering about the ominous clouds*...
John: Hey.

John: Will you marry me?

Me (in my head): ...*GOGGLE* BUH? *GOGGLE* SQUEEEEE!!!!

Me: YES!!!

Before you ask:

1) No date set. We’re going to enjoy a longer engagement so that John can finish his studies and find employment.

2) He had the ring on him for most of the week, and was looking for the Right Moment to propose. Turns out that after I'd won him Necky the Engagement Giraffe (below) playing Whack-a-Mole, it was the Right Moment.



3) Yes, it was a big surprise. As John notes, I wasn't expecting to see anything until after he graduated.


Don't mind me, I'll be squeeing for a while.

I'm scooping John on this one....

Barack rolled!





Based solely on his dancing skills, I'd vote for him. 8 )